On this episode of Queens On A Roll, I sit down with my cousin Amanda to discuss what it is like for her to live with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). You don't want to miss it! So Come Roll with Us!
On this episode of Queens On A Roll, I sit down with my cousin Amanda to discuss what it is like for her to live with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). You don't want to miss it! So Come Roll with Us!
(Instrumental Music) You got a Dstackz beat
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Yeah, I got a Dstackz beat
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Listen to the beat y'all
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(Instrumental Music)
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Come on, Dstackz
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Bring it in.
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(Instrumental Music)
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(Instrumental MusIc) Wooo
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Queens On A Roll
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Beautiful Queens, Queens, Queens On A Roll
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(Instrumental Music) & singing We're moving, we're grooving, we're jamming, we're slamming
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Queens On A Roll
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(Instrumental Music) & singing We're moving, we're grooving, we're jamming, we're slamming
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(Instrumental Music) & singing She's educating and inspiring
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(Instrumental Music) & singing everyone that has challenges.
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Queens, Queens, Queens On A Roll
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(Instrumental Music) & singing She's educating and inspiring everyone and having fun.
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Beautiful Queens On A Roll
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Come roll with us
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Wooo Come roll with us
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Come roll with us
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Wooo Come roll with us
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Wooo Queens On A Roll
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Queenssssss
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(Instrumental Music) & singing Queenssssss, Bells chiming
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Hey everyone, and welcome back to
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Queens On A Roll podcast.
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This is Latavia here and I'm so
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excited to be back for season two.
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(Cheering sound effect)
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And what better way to kick off
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season two than with my cousin Amanda. Hey.
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Hey, Amanda. How are you doing?
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I'm doing great.
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I'm happy to be a part of the podcast on this season.
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Season one was awesome.
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Thank you so, so much. Yes.
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So here at Queens On A Roll podcast, we
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highlight kings and queens who are ably different.
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So, as many of you may not know, Amanda has ADHD.
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So I wanted to bring you on Amanda, to discuss that.
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Are you ready? Yes, I am.
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So let's roll.
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(Instrumental Music)
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So I took a course on ADHD a while back, and
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it said some of the causes were a chemical imbalance in
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the brain or it had a genetic component to it.
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And sometimes it feels like
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not sometimes, all the time.
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It feels like your brain is always running, running, running
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But what does it feel like to you?
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Well, for me, it does feel
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like my brain is always running.
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I come up with all sorts of things
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that I desire to do at one time.
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And it's like you want to do all the things at once,
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so it'll make you feel like you're all over the place.
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I tend to say my brain is like scrambled eggs
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because I feel that everything is all over the place.
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That's interesting.
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That's definitely interesting.
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How is it like navigating life feeling like you're always
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thinking about 20 different things at one time.
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So for me, I have to come up with different plans for
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myself to say, okay, I don't want to live like this.
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So I have the choice of either to take medicine,
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which I was previously on Adderall, and then I decided
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that I wanted to try to handle it myself.
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So I try to take on one task
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at a time and focus on that task.
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And once I'm finished focusing on that task,
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then I will go to the next task.
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Oh That's interesting because I did read in the course,
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they said like you can learn different strategies to handle
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it, or you can take the medication.
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They suggest taking medication as the like best option
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so that you can think clearly and focus.
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But why did you decide like medication
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wasn't the avenue for you?
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I believe medication can work.
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It depends on the atmosphere in which you're in.
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So when I was in school.
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Where I had to remember multiple assignments at one
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time or I had to do multiple different tasks.
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I then will take my medicine so that I will
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be on task so that I could complete all the
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assignments that I was given at that time.
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But on my daily life.
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I'm able to control it better because it's at
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my leisure of how the things are done.
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So in school, you have a time frame in
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which you have to complete things, and at your
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home and on your leisure, you can pick and
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choose when you desire for them to be done.
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So I feel that when it's on my own,
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I can choose how to organize different things.
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But if it has to be where I have
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to be punctual with completing things, then I feel
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like medication will be the option at that time.
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And were you diagnosed with it as a child?
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So as a child, my mother did a lot of
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research, and I was in a lot of studies for
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ADHD, and I was diagnosed as a child with ADHD.
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When I got to my adult age, when it was time for
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me to attend college, I realized that at that time I still
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had it, and I had to then try to find something for
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me to do for myself to be able to complete college.
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So then I went back and got reevaluated,
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and they still diagnosed me with it.
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So then that's when I received Adderall.
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So from what I read, they said when
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it's young and kids, they like to do
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the behavioral therapy and they like to try
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different avenues before they put you on medication.
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Right.
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And there's some environmental changes you could
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try, like natural lighting, some home remedies.
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But you're saying for you in
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certain settings that Adderall worked.
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Yes, they actually did those things as well.
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They put me in a group therapy where I was
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with multiple different children that had the similar diagnosis.
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So it was ADHD or ADD which
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is attention deficit disorder, and they were
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basically having similar things going on.
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So it was a decent atmosphere to be in at the
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time as a kid, because you were able to see that
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you were not the only person dealing with that diagnosis.
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It was other people that were
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still dealing with it also.
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So it made you feel like you were in the
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atmosphere at that time where you weren't solely alone.
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Right.
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And what were some signs
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that you noticed about yourself?
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cuz some of the signs they were saying in
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that course is that you get easily distracted.
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You know, You can't sit still, you're fidgety all
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the time, you have to move.
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But they were also saying that in girls
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is hard to diagnose because we try to
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work hard to like kind of mask those issues.
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Did you find yourself doing that often? Yeah.
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So for me, I noticed that I was kind of
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all over the place, but it was still where I
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don't want to accept that I had ADHD.
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So I tried to do my best to say, okay,
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well, they say you're going to be all over the
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place, so try not to be all over the place
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or they say, you're going to be doing multiple things
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at once, so try not to do multiple things.
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So I tried to really challenge myself so that
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I wouldn't do all those things that they said
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that I would do, but sometimes I find myself
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still doing them anyway because I feel like as
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a child, it's difficult to diagnose ADHD overall because
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children tend to be naturally all over the place.
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So as you get older, then they can better
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say they have an issue with paying attention and
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focusing, or they have issue with paying attention overall.
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So I think that it becomes a
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little challenging as you get older and
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realize that you actually have that diagnosis. Right
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So you know what's interesting is that you actually did
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say some of the things that they say why it's
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easier to kind of diagnose boys than the girls.
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Because they say in boys that
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you're always up, moving around.
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They're very impulsive, they'll take risks.
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But girls often, like, try to mask the symptoms and
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try to work harder so you don't see it.
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Why did you feel the need to try to mask it?
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Was it that you wasn't comfortable having ADHD or like you
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just felt like, I can do it on my own?
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As I started to begin to understand ADHD more, it
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really didn't seem to me much as a disability.
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It seemed as if it just made you more, like, unique.
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I want to do multiple things, I
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want to be in multiple places.
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But it does make you kind of, like, disorganized.
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So in a sense, it wasn't really like a masking thing
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that I'll try to say, oh, no, I don't have it.
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But it was just, how do I deal with what I have?
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So try to just work with it.
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And some tactics that I came
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up with work and others didn't.
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So it depends on if you want to face it and say, I
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have it, or you feel like, okay, I don't want to face it,
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and I'm going to just live my life as if I'm normal.
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So it depends on, I feel like, the individual themselves
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to say what they actually feel like and what techniques
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do you use to help you through your day?
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So for me now, as an adult, it has
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become a little easier to deal with ADHD because
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I'm more settled in my life in general.
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So I do basic things every day.
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I work, pick up my daughter from school,
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we eat, we do homework, and we basically
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do the same thing again all over again.
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So it's not really much structure or
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much organization that needs to go on.
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And my brain is staying, like, focused.
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But if I say I'm gonna do a task,
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like, right now, I'm trynna remodel my home.
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So in remodeling my home, I think of 25 different
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things that I want to do on my home, and
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I want to do all of them at one time.
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So it makes me feel like my
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brain is all over the place.
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So I'm going to furniture store, I'm going to
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organizing store like all over the place.
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So in this instance, I have to just tell myself today
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that, you know what, focus on one room at a time.
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And as you focus on one room at a time and
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get one thing done at a time, then it will work.
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Because if you try to do everything, it'll make
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me feel like I'm all over the place.
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So I don't want to feel like I'm all over the place.
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So I will work on one room at a time.
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So that's what the agreement I made with myself.
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So you put everything basically into smaller chunks or
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smaller tasks to help you accomplish them better?
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Yes, definitely. Good. Definitely. Good.
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And it actually brings to mind something
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that I also read in the course,
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that there's actually two distinctions.
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And you're right.
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Even though we look at ADHD as a disability,
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there was this one book written by Thomas Hartman
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and it's different perspective of attention deficit disorder.
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And he basically says that there's two
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classifications, there's explorers and there's farmers.
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So the explorers are risk takers.
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They're going to try every and any and no
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matter the result, they're going to figure out, even
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if it's a good or bad result, they're going
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to figure out how to overcome that step.
(12:29.4 - 12:30.5)
Then there's farmers.
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They want it organized logical and straight in a line.
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And if it doesn't end up going the way
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that they anticipated it to go, it makes them
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very frustrated because that's not something I can control.
(12:43.9 - 12:46.9)
And listening to you describe how you felt
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and how you have to have everything organized.
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I would say you have to be a farmer.
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Would you say that?
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Yes, I would agree. Definitely.
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I definitely would agree.
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I would say you're a
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farmer because you like everything organized.
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And then if it doesn't go that way, you have
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to think of a plan B, but you don't really
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like the plan B, you know what I mean?
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Yeah, that's true.
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I feel like organization came as I got older.
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Initially I was a little bit all over the place.
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Maybe at my younger age I could say I was an explorer.
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But at my older age now I really think that I'm
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a farmer because I feel that I tend to keep things
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like try to keep things as in order as I can
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due to the fact of knowing that I have ADHD.
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So I want to make sure that I try to stay
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on every task, try to complete whatever tasks I start.
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Because now I'm also a mother
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with a child with ADHD also.
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So it's very difficult to be a mother
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with ADHD, having a child with ADHD too.
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So it tends to be challenging because the things
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that I did in my younger age she's doing.
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And in my older age, I want her to
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do those things now, so it could be challenging.
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That's interesting.
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How is it navigating being a mother who has
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ADHD and now having to raise a child with
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ADHD, what challenges do you face there and what
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are some of the positive things about it?
(14:10.8 - 14:13.8)
Well, it's a lot of organization that
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I'm trying to get her to.
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I think that at this age, she's an explorer and
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she's willing to take whatever risk or chances she can
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take and she doesn't really pay attention to the outcome.
(14:24.7 - 14:26.7)
So she's kind of all over the place.
(14:26.7 - 14:28.7)
So at this time, she's currently taking her
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medication to keep her on track and focus.
(14:31.1 - 14:32.4)
And when she does, she is
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definitely keeping things on track.
(14:34.8 - 14:36.8)
But we're working on her, keeping
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things organized and keeping tasks done.
(14:39.9 - 14:42.8)
So she just received a ton of chores that
(14:42.8 - 14:44.3)
she has to do and they have to be
(14:44.3 - 14:46.2)
done and completed by a certain day.
(14:46.3 - 14:48.0)
And if they are, then she will receive
(14:48.1 - 14:49.8)
money for completing them at that time.
(14:49.9 - 14:52.5)
So we try to do like a goal chart and
(14:52.5 - 14:54.8)
to try to have her achieve every goal that she
(14:54.9 - 14:57.3)
sets out or that I give her to accomplish.
(14:57.4 - 15:00.9)
So it's becoming a little easier to
(15:01.1 - 15:03.3)
manage because we're coming up with different
(15:03.4 - 15:05.2)
tactics that works for each other.
(15:05.3 - 15:08.9)
Because with ADHD also, I realized that you have
(15:09.0 - 15:11.5)
to go with what actually works for you because
(15:11.6 - 15:15.2)
sometimes people can give you ideas or suggestions, but
(15:15.3 - 15:17.2)
I noticed that a lot of them, if we
(15:17.2 - 15:19.8)
can't actually accomplish them, then it's pointless.
(15:20.0 - 15:21.2)
So you have to set out goals
(15:21.3 - 15:23.4)
for yourself that you can actually achieve.
(15:23.5 - 15:24.1)
That's great.
(15:24.2 - 15:25.2)
Did you hear that, guys?
(15:25.3 - 15:27.1)
That was an excellent, excellent
(15:27.2 - 15:29.0)
tip that parents can use.
(15:29.0 - 15:31.6)
That was definitely, definitely great.
(15:31.7 - 16:12.0)
(Instrumental Music)
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(Its Fun Fact time Sound Effect)
(16:14.9 - 16:19.3)
My fun fact for today is that girls often get
(16:19.4 - 16:24.1)
misdiagnosed with ADHD because like I said before, they
(16:24.1 - 16:27.1)
always try to work hard to mask the things
(16:27.1 - 16:30.0)
you may see that come along with ADHD.
(16:30.1 - 16:32.0)
So they often get misdiagnosed.
(16:32.1 - 16:34.7)
And it's a fact that actually, even though they
(16:34.8 - 16:39.3)
get misdiagnosed, scientists believe that boys and girls actually
(16:39.3 - 16:42.8)
get diagnosed with ADHD at the same rate.
(16:43.0 - 16:45.5)
(Delayed beat sound effect)
(16:45.5 - 16:48.4)
So tell me, what is your most fondest memory?
(16:48.5 - 16:50.5)
It could be of us together or anything.
(16:50.6 - 16:50.6)
You remember
(16:50.6 - 16:53.6)
(Storytime sound effect)
(16:53.6 - 16:56.2)
I recall a time that me and you were
(16:56.3 - 17:00.7)
going to take a bus and we were actually
(17:00.8 - 17:03.7)
trying to beat the bus because you were actually
(17:03.8 - 17:06.3)
saying, okay, my chair can out beat the bus.
(17:06.3 - 17:09.2)
So we're going to take the chair and we're going
(17:09.2 - 17:11.4)
to see if we can get there before the bus
(17:11.4 - 17:14.3)
because we had our own agenda before it was time
(17:14.4 - 17:16.3)
for you to get where you needed to be.
(17:16.3 - 17:19.2)
So we actually tried to out beat the bus.
(17:19.2 - 17:22.4)
And when we got close, we said, okay, we're going to take
(17:22.5 - 17:24.7)
this bus right here and it's going to take us to the
(17:24.8 - 17:27.4)
next stop and we're going to be there before time.
(17:27.4 - 17:29.4)
And when we got on the bus,
(17:29.6 - 17:31.8)
you actually got stuck on the lift.
(17:31.9 - 17:35.4)
And we realized that our plan didn't really set
(17:35.5 - 17:37.9)
out to be what we had desired for it
(17:38.0 - 17:40.6)
to be because now we were actually late.
(17:40.7 - 17:44.1)
So I think that that taught us to take the route
(17:44.1 - 17:47.5)
that our parents told us to take initially and not try
(17:47.5 - 17:50.1)
to out beat what they told us to do.
(17:50.2 - 17:53.5)
And maybe that wouldn't have happened to us because the
(17:53.5 - 17:56.7)
first bus would not have had the same malfunctions.
(17:57.3 - 17:59.0)
Oh You are definitely right. And you know what?
(17:59.0 - 18:03.2)
I remember that story that was so hilarious. (Amanda laughing)
(18:03.7 - 18:09.2)
We were literally running for the bus y'all like running.
(18:09.3 - 18:11.2)
Amanda and I have always gotten
(18:11.2 - 18:13.1)
into like some crazy things.
(18:13.2 - 18:18.0)
When we were teenagers, Yes we did I remember, we use to makeup remember we used to make up, dances remember?
(18:18.1 - 18:21.8)
dances, yes we did, yes we did (Amanda laughing)
(18:21.8 - 18:26.6)
we gotta show the listeners one of our dances one day
(18:26.6 - 18:27.0)
Yes.
(18:27.1 - 18:31.0)
One day we definitely have to do that. We have to. Yes
(18:31.0 - 18:34.0)
I remember we did it to Mario, Mario's song Crying out for love
(18:34.2 - 18:38.5)
Yupp, Yupp we did, yupp and we did it for Tamia to
(18:38.5 - 18:42.1)
Yupp we made a whole dance and when my mom got home from work
(18:42.2 - 18:44.7)
We said look, we got a whole routine
(18:44.7 - 18:46.4)
We had made up a whole dance
(18:46.6 - 18:49.1)
Yupp We definitely did, we got into some crazy, crazy stuff.
(18:49.2 - 18:50.2)
We sure did.
(18:50.3 - 18:52.8)
So tell me what you are doing now.
(18:52.9 - 18:55.2)
What is your future endeavors?
(18:55.5 - 18:56.4)
What do you got planned?
(18:56.4 - 18:58.3)
What you got going on, girl? What you got going on?
(18:58.4 - 19:00.9)
So right now I'm currently a teacher for
(19:01.0 - 19:03.4)
pre K kindergarten and it's going okay.
(19:03.5 - 19:06.4)
I think that the children are really happy
(19:06.5 - 19:08.4)
with having me as a teacher and I'm
(19:08.5 - 19:10.4)
really excited to be their teacher as well.
(19:10.5 - 19:13.0)
It does kind of make me sad when they have to
(19:13.1 - 19:17.4)
transition out and go on to first grade or go on
(19:17.4 - 19:20.4)
to kindergarten, whether their parents allow them to stay or not.
(19:20.5 - 19:23.4)
But for the most part, it is a job that keeps
(19:23.4 - 19:25.9)
me on my toes and it does allow me to constantly
(19:25.9 - 19:28.8)
keep moving, which people with ADHD love to do.
(19:29.0 - 19:31.4)
So it's going really well.
(19:31.4 - 19:35.9)
But my ultimate goal is to become a coach, to
(19:36.0 - 19:38.5)
lead people and guide people in a direction where I
(19:38.5 - 19:41.4)
feel that they can be helpful or give them advice
(19:41.5 - 19:44.8)
or tips on how to do things because people always
(19:44.9 - 19:46.8)
call me for advice or opinions.
(19:46.9 - 19:50.0)
So I think that coaching people and leading people in
(19:50.0 - 19:53.0)
a direction will be something that I can actually do
(19:53.0 - 19:55.3)
for a living that will really make me happy.
(19:55.4 - 19:58.5)
So that is my long term goal, which I hope is not
(19:58.5 - 20:02.4)
too far out to actually start my own business on coaching.
(20:02.5 - 20:03.1)
Okay y'all
(20:03.2 - 20:05.5)
And she's humble right now because she's a
(20:05.6 - 20:08.4)
very great teacher and she's actually going back
(20:08.5 - 20:11.0)
to school right now for her bachelor's degree.
(20:11.1 - 20:12.2)
I just had to put that out
(20:12.2 - 20:14.0)
there because she was being humble.
(20:14.1 - 20:16.9)
But I definitely do agree with you.
(20:16.9 - 20:19.3)
Like, when my students leave me or I finish
(20:19.4 - 20:21.7)
for the school year because I am an independent
(20:21.8 - 20:24.8)
contractor, SLP so when I finish for the school
(20:24.8 - 20:27.2)
year, I definitely do miss them.
(20:27.2 - 20:29.7)
So I can definitely understand that.
(20:29.9 - 20:32.2)
Especially when you love your job and
(20:32.3 - 20:34.4)
you love making connections with students.
(20:34.5 - 20:37.1)
That's the definite tough part of it.
(20:37.2 - 20:39.0)
So I definitely can relate to that.
(20:39.1 - 20:40.2)
It really is.
(20:40.3 - 21:20.0)
(Instrumental Music)
(21:20.0 - 21:22.7)
So we close it out on Queens on
(21:22.7 - 21:25.2)
A Roll with a quote of the episode.
(21:25.3 - 21:27.5)
Do you have one for us or any
(21:27.6 - 21:30.3)
words of wisdom you would like to share?
(21:30.5 - 21:35.1)
Well, I can say, well, whether you're a farmer or you're an
(21:35.2 - 21:38.3)
explorer, I think that you should go with what you feel is
(21:38.3 - 21:41.7)
best for yourself and try to take on one test at a
(21:41.7 - 21:44.7)
time and not to never do too much at once.
(21:44.9 - 21:46.1)
Awww That's great advice.
(21:46.2 - 21:48.8)
That is definitely some great advice.
(21:48.8 - 21:51.7)
(Delayed beat sound effect)
(21:51.7 - 21:55.7)
So the information heard in today's episode is courtesy
(21:55.7 - 21:58.1)
of the course that I took and a book
(21:58.2 - 22:02.1)
by Thomas Hartman called The Different Perspectives on ADHD.
(22:02.2 - 22:04.9)
And there's a plethora of other information which
(22:05.0 - 22:07.1)
I'm going to give you right now.
(22:07.3 - 22:09.6)
There's a lot of resources for the Centers for
(22:09.6 - 22:15.4)
Disease Control on ADHD and Hyperactivity behavioral therapy for
(22:15.5 - 22:18.2)
young children from the Centers and Disease Control.
(22:18.4 - 22:21.9)
There's also a book that is called
(22:22.0 - 22:24.1)
New Thinking on Kids with ADHD.
(22:24.1 - 22:27.3)
A healthy lifestyle could be effective intervention.
(22:27.4 - 22:30.6)
There is also another book that is
(22:30.6 - 22:34.2)
called Adolescence with Children with ADHD.
(22:34.3 - 22:37.5)
And there's also some great information from the Food and
(22:37.6 - 22:42.7)
Drug Administration on dealing with ADHD, as well as an
(22:42.7 - 22:46.1)
article in Attitude magazine called What Is ADHD?
(22:46.1 - 22:50.2)
And how to Explain ADHD to Your Child, and also another
(22:50.4 - 22:53.1)
book that is called What They Are and How They Work.
(22:53.1 - 22:55.5)
Accommodations Understood for learning
(22:55.5 - 22:56.6)
and attention Issues.
(22:56.7 - 22:59.9)
And one more comes from an article
(22:59.9 - 23:03.4)
in childmind.org that says ADHD and Exercise,
(23:03.6 - 23:05.9)
and it comes from the childmind Institute.
(23:06.1 - 23:08.5)
So thank you guys for listening.
(23:08.6 - 23:10.1)
Thank you guys for sharing.
(23:10.2 - 23:13.9)
I'm so grateful, so, so, so grateful to Amanda for being on
(23:14.0 - 23:16.2)
I just want to give a shout out to Dstackz
(23:16.3 - 23:18.0)
Thank you so much for the beats
(23:18.1 - 23:21.0)
People are loving them and they have been amazing.
(23:21.4 - 23:25.7)
I'm so, so grateful to you guys for sharing and listening.
(23:25.8 - 23:27.6)
Please continue to subscribe.
(23:27.9 - 23:30.4)
Please tell your friends, your sisters, your mothers,
(23:30.4 - 23:33.1)
your brothers, everybody you could possibly think of.
(23:33.2 - 23:36.9)
And we're rolling out. Say bye Manda. See you guys.
(23:36.9 - 23:40.6)
Thank you for having me Tay. You're welcome.
(23:40.6 - 24:25.2)
(Instrumental Music)
(24:25.2 - 24:34.9)
PLEASE go follow our insta @queensonaroll.podcast & FB Queens On A Roll & submit those questions to queensonaroll.podcast@gmail.com